As much as you can handle...

Whether you are a religious person or not I truly believe that in your lifetime you will not be given more heartache than you can handle. Call me impossibly optimistic but this is how I survive.
I started this blog for two reasons. The first was to share my experiences. During our struggles with infertility and post partum depression I felt so alone. I felt like everyone around me was pregnant and that those little bundles of joy were exactly that...joy...to everyone but me. I realized later that I wasn't alone and that no one ever talked about it. So that's why I share. But the second reason was more selfish. I found it incredibly therapeutic. I'm not sure if it was just writing it all out or if it was feeling that by helping others it made my pain worthwhile. But either way, blogging has made me feel better. If you follow regularly, you may have noticed that I blog much less often. I am busier but it's mostly because I have shared most of what I needed to say and I no longer require the therapy. Until today. Today's post is selfish because I need to put it down to get past it in my mind. Life is incredibly hard and unfair. Today I am bitter and I am hoping this will help.
Today I am thinking back to how I felt during my struggle to become mom. I truly believe that I could not have handled more than I was handed during this time. One more disappointment would have pushed me over the edge. I have watched so many people endure similar struggles and I can feel their pain because it is all too familiar. Today I learned of two people who must be much stronger than I am. They have been dealt an incredibly unfair hand. They are required to endure sorrow unlike any I have experienced. And because I know you are only given what you can handle, I know they will survive. They must be incredibly resilient.
I promise to share their story when the time is right. Right now it is not mine to tell. And at this point their story is far from over. I know their story will have a happy ending. It just seems really far away today. If you are religious say a prayer and if you are not send a thought. Because sometimes you just need that extra push to get through.