Thankful

When I was desperately trying to get pregnant I had a friend who told to me to journal every night about something that I was thankful for.  When you are obsessed with infertility, you lose perspective on how great the other things are that are around you.  For example, instead of being thankful for friends and family at Christmas you are instead jealous that the Virgin Mary had a baby without trying at all.  Ridiculous?  Absolutely. 

Without naming any names, I want to share some of the people and things that I am thankful for...

I am thankful to a selfless family for giving me the opportunity to be a mother to a fantastic little girl.  I am grateful to a group of people who helped me through the failure of my first IVF, who helped me create Jack, and who supported me through a very scary first trimester.  I am grateful to anyone and everyone who helped get me through the worst of the worst of my post partum depression.  And to a fantastic lady at the support centre...I am sure I would not have made it without your support.  To my friend that did her work at my kitchen table, to my friend who let me cry on her couch repeatedly, to my friend who did not breastfeed either of her kids....I thank you.  To those who made me leave the house when I so desperately wanted to stay in my pajamas....I realize you were so right.  Thanks!  To those who shared their stories so I was not alone...you are the very best.  To the knowledgeable and kind lady who did our homestudy....you made what I would have assumed to be an awkward situation into something amazing.  Your support and information made things so much easier for us.  To the people who put us in contact with Lily's birth family....how do you even say thanks for something so incredible?  To our dear friends who took Lily when I went into labour and stayed up with her from 3:30 am...so very kind.  For my friends....you have helped the whole way...even when I was mean about baby showers, when I had to be forced from my car for a  Tim Horton's break, and when I didn't listen to your incredible advice about depression and baby supplies.  To my dear friend who dropped everything to come to my house during my first IVF and during the breastfeeding debacle.  To my family for accepting our decision to adopt wholeheartedly and for never looking back. 

To all of you reading this.  Thank you for giving me the opportunity to write this all out and feel like my experiences had a purpose.  I hope I do not disappoint.

To my kids for being the cutest and smartest. (I know every mom says that!!) To my husband for having sex during pneumonia, for masturbating in the hospital (even though you work there), for all the post-procedure lunches, for holding my hand, for surviving the journey, and for being the very best husband and father ever.

THANK YOU!!